from the airplane, over Oakland, Canon Digital Rebel XSi

The Opening of Eyes

That day I saw beneath dark clouds
the passing light over the water
and I heard the voice of the world speak out,
I knew then, as I had before
life is no passing memory of what has been
nor the remaining pages in a great book
waiting to be read.
It is the opening of eyes long closed.
It is the vision of far off things
seen for the silence they hold.
It is the heart after years
of secret conversing
speaking out loud in the clear air.
It is Moses in the desert
fallen to his knees before the lit bush.
It is the man throwing away his shoes
as if to enter heaven
and finding himself astonished,
opened at last,
fallen in love with solid ground.

– David Whyte
from Songs for Coming Home
©1984 Many Rivers Press

Ben pointing to his fave animal, the orca, Seattle, WA, Canon Digital Rebel XSi

Just got back from Seattle where I got to see family, one of my favorite people in the world, and met up with a new friend to see the Luminaria around Green Lake. The only thing I missed that I have to do next time for sure is eat at Delancey’s. (I have been reading Homemade Life and loved the idea of going to her wonderful restaurant.)

The highlight for Ben was meeting Bella, Kelly Rae’s dog. Ben played “Baby Bella” which involved stripping down naked, following her around and imitating her every move. We were almost hyperventilating with laughter when we looked under the dinner table and saw that Ben’s “paws” matched Bella’s perfectly. Seriously Ben, could you be any cuter?

Luminaria night, Green Lake, Seattle, WA, Canon Digital Rebel XSi

This is a shot of Green Lake on the night of the luminaria. So happy Tara Weaver told us about it… it was magic to walk around the lake. (Fits in beautifully with her incredible project called Stalking Wonder)

It Felt Like a Kiss, SF, Canon Digital Rebel XSi

The new year is always an exciting time for me. I love wiping the slate clean, buying a new calendar and beginning again. It is also a ripe time for ritual, so if you you would like to join me in one now, I would like to invite you to be part of a Mondo Beyondo exercise for 2009.

The surest way to start fresh and move forward is to be at peace with what came before. You might have had an incredible year, a dull year, or a truly difficult year. Whatever happened, your aim is to celebrate what there is to celebrate about it and grieve what there is to grieve…

My challenge for you is to answer the following questions and declare 2009 complete. Rituals can be even more powerful when others can witness you. You are welcome to do this exercise privately, but I suggest sharing with a friend and/or posting your lists here. You are in good, safe company. (Feel free to post anonymously) 

1. What do you want to acknowledge yourself for in regard to 2009?
(What did you create? What challenges did you face with courage and strength? What promises did you keep to yourself? What brave choices did you make? What are you proud of?) 

2. What is there to grieve about 2009?
(What was disappointing? What was scary? What was hard? What can you forgive yourself for?) 

3. What else do you need to say about the year to declare it complete?
Okay, the next step is to say out loud, “I declare 2009 complete!” How do you feel? If you don’t feel quite right, there might be one more thing to say…

The final step is to consider your primary focus for the year to come. What is your primary intention or theme for 2009? Is it the year of joy? the year of self-care? the year of partnership? Stand up and say it proud, “2009 is my year of….”

Each week something new will be on sale! This week is the bullseye superhero pendant… The perfect gift for superhero girls!

Me jumping, by Kelly Rae Roberts, Berkeley, CACanon Digital Rebel XSi

((The fabulous Gwen Bell started The Best of 2009 Challenge through the month of December)) The first prompt is this: What was your best trip in 2009?

This is mine:

My best trip in 2009 was in January. It was a surprise- a gift I had never expected to receive- and I still marvel at the power of it and the depth of its kindness.

It all started back in December 2008 when a package arrives in the mail. It is a matted print, a photograph of me on one side, leaping in the air happily, the word “eternal” stenciled on the building behind me. On the other side of the print is a letter that I notice is from two of my dearest friends… my curiosity is piqued.

Let me back up by saying that I had been in a really dark place for months. Perhaps you know the kind of place I was in? crying nearly every day, down down down, up against my darkest stuff. I describe last year as being slammed into the pavement, feeling worthless and low, wondering if I was even worth being loved. (I know, I know, it sounds dramatic now) I spent endless months collapsed into myself this way, wondering what was wrong with me, if there was any way to fix all the ways I was broken, if I was even worth the work.

These friends were my lifeline. They reminded me of who I really am. They reminded me of my goodness. They sat on the other end of the phone through countless sobbing sessions. They didn’t roll their eyes and wish I would get over it, but let me tell my stories over and over again, until I was all wrung out. They were endlessly patient.

And then the letter came.

They told me how much they cared about me, all the ways I am a good friend to them, all the ways they love me. My eyes were so full of tears I could barely read the last paragraph explaining the airline ticket enclosed. They had arranged for all of us to rendezvous in New York City for a few days, all expenses paid, a little adventure to celebrate our friendship and to show how much they loved me. I was stunned. Matt, who opened it with me, was grinning. Turns out he was in on it too.

Something deep was healed in me that day. I didn’t even need the trip for that, although the trip was truly wonderful. The real gift was the extraordinary kindness of this act of love and friendship. As we strolled through the streets of New York in January, shopping, taking photos, having scandalous girl talk til all hours of the night, my heart was lifted in brand new ways.

My best trip of 2009 was a journey in friendship and a lesson in the healing power of love.