The magic wishbone + how we really get our wishes.

Michelle Allen, Leigh Standley and Flora Bowley, Manzanita, OR

Recently, I attended a miraculous weekend retreat with a group of friends. We spent five days sharing stories, making collaborative paintings, taking gorgeous beach walks and coaching each other around our businesses + creative work.

We called it the “Radiate Sessions.”

Each person had a turn bringing something to the group they needed support with or guidance around. We created a loving circle around them and radiated pure possibility (plus all of our best collective wisdom) straight from our hearts to theirs. Whether it was your turn or not, you were transformed. Whatever medicine was being offered was somehow just what the rest of us needed too.

Kelly Rae Roberts and Mati Rose McDonough

We ate a lot of cheese, Kelly Rae, Flora, Mati, Hannah, Jess, Michelle

Photos at the magic hour are a requirement for any retreat, Manzanita, OR

Photography lesson by Vivienne McMaster

This retreat was incredibly heart-opening for me. The kind where you feel cracked open in the best way… crying lots of cathartic tears and expressing the most tender parts of your soul. While I feared that Zoloft would numb me out, it has done quite the opposite – it has calmed me down enough to feel the deeper layers of my heart -the unprocessed grief of the last 6 years, the profound love I have for my family and new hope for what’s possible in the future. My radiate session was about where my work is headed, but what these women really helped me do was open my heart.

The Wishbone

As we left the house on the final morning, we all scrambled to get the sheets in the dryer, the dishes in the washer, and all of our bags packed and out the door. When I did a last scan of the house, I noticed that we had left one thing behind- a wishbone sitting on the kitchen counter.

“Who wants to do the wishbone with me?” I asked.

I haven’t wished on a wishbone since I was a kid, but as Leigh and I put our hands on each side of it I remembered the rules – that when it breaks, whoever gets the bigger piece will get their wish.

“Wait!” I said urgently, concerned that only one of us would get their wish, “Let’s make wishes for each other!”

So Leigh closed her eyes, and I closed mine, and I thought of the most wonderful secret wish for her. As we leaned backwards my worry returned, Oh no! What if she doesn’t get her wish?

At that moment, the wishbone broke. And something miraculous happened.

The center of the wishbone flew into the air, leaving two perfectly even pieces in each of our hands.

We all gasped.

For all the magic of the weekend, the wishbone moment is the one I keep coming back to. And I think it’s because the message was so beautiful and so clear:

That when we want the best for each other, when we don’t want to win if it means someone else will lose, when we know that my joy is yours and your success is mine, we all get our wishes.

And that my friends, is something to celebrate.

P.S. If a retreat like this is calling to you, stay tuned. I was so inspired by this weekend that I am planning my own intimate gathering for the end of September. If you want to be the first to know, email me here: [email protected]




  1. Posted February 26, 2013 at 11:33 pm | Permalink

    that is incredible! + lovely. + true. :) xx

  2. Posted February 26, 2013 at 11:35 pm | Permalink

    The Universe speaks wishbone language! I knew it!


  3. Posted February 26, 2013 at 11:43 pm | Permalink

    every last word bringing undeniable tears rushing right back.

  4. Posted February 26, 2013 at 11:55 pm | Permalink


  5. Posted February 26, 2013 at 11:55 pm | Permalink

    Goosebumps. I’ll never forget that moment or all of our gasping. This is so beautiful, Andrea, thank you for articulating it so perfectly! xoxo

  6. Posted February 27, 2013 at 12:04 am | Permalink

    Like Lacy, i’m teary over here too…such a powerful moment and to have it shared through your incredible way of storytelling Andrea…so beautiful. this learning (that we all get our wishes when we want what is best for one another) is one now totally embedded in my heart.

  7. Posted February 27, 2013 at 12:29 am | Permalink

    best message EVER! wow! how magically powerful. LOVE it so much!!!

  8. Posted February 27, 2013 at 4:21 am | Permalink

    as ever, lovely, raw, honest and magical…

  9. Renee
    Posted February 27, 2013 at 1:20 pm | Permalink

    So beautiful and brought tears to my eyes. Simply wonderful!

  10. Posted February 27, 2013 at 1:56 pm | Permalink

    love this andrea! you have such a beautiful way of telling a story and my goodness — what an incredible story to tell.

  11. Posted February 27, 2013 at 3:15 pm | Permalink

    wow. I too have been thinking of going on a retreat. Maybe for my 40th bday, or sooner. One of the spots in my hearts that needs help with a big wound is friendship. Specifically friendship with other women. It is something that both scares me..but something I also realize I really need in my life. Thank you for sharing about your retreat weekend. It sounds like it was a wonderful time surrounded by a great group of ladies! :)

  12. Jacqueline
    Posted February 27, 2013 at 9:37 pm | Permalink

    That message just keeps ringing true for me over and over. There is enough for everyone. Wishbone Moment!

  13. Posted February 28, 2013 at 4:32 am | Permalink

    reading this gave me chills. i wish i was standing there when all this took place. but honestly, the way your wrote it might have been even better than actually being there!

  14. CLH
    Posted February 28, 2013 at 5:04 am | Permalink

    i love how vivid and immediate you made that story for us! that moment already feels archetypal and eternal . . .

  15. Posted February 28, 2013 at 4:18 pm | Permalink

    Beautiful story. Thanks so much for sharing!

  16. Lucy
    Posted February 28, 2013 at 5:13 pm | Permalink

    not kidding, tingly as I read the wishbone portion ….

  17. Posted February 28, 2013 at 5:15 pm | Permalink

    What a beautiful story to start my day with. Right after helping my husband make a big wish of his come true yesterday too. Thank you!

  18. Posted February 28, 2013 at 5:16 pm | Permalink

    What the what. That is so incredible.

  19. Kathleen
    Posted February 28, 2013 at 5:19 pm | Permalink

    Love your beautiful story! Wishing for all of us to get those retreats with our girlfriends! Both old friends and new ones! Namaste!

  20. GoldenBlue
    Posted February 28, 2013 at 5:23 pm | Permalink

    Wow. This sounds soooooo amazing! Just a real feel good experience…

  21. Posted February 28, 2013 at 5:27 pm | Permalink

    This resonated so deeply with me, and I just sent your beautiful essay to my dear friend because we are pulling for each other’s endeavors. Thank you!

  22. Posted February 28, 2013 at 5:35 pm | Permalink

    Wow. What a lovely story Andrea. And a magical ending. Thanks for sharing.

  23. Karoline
    Posted February 28, 2013 at 5:45 pm | Permalink


  24. Posted February 28, 2013 at 6:23 pm | Permalink

    This story will permeate my day- okay perhaps my soul! Thank you so much for sharing these exquisite moments when the universe winks at you!

  25. Posted February 28, 2013 at 7:05 pm | Permalink

    I love the wishbone story. What a wonderful sign and message. Sounds like a wonderful time with some amazing friends.

  26. Posted February 28, 2013 at 8:11 pm | Permalink

    I literally got chills reading this. What a wonderful post about possibility, friendship, love and support.

  27. Posted February 28, 2013 at 9:00 pm | Permalink

    All I can say is . . . whoa!!!! Message received – loud and clear : )

  28. Vanessa Sabarese
    Posted February 28, 2013 at 9:06 pm | Permalink

    Beautiful story Andrea. Jaqueline, I can’t wait to find more Wishbone Moments!

  29. Posted March 1, 2013 at 12:08 am | Permalink

    Wow, just wow! Sounds like a truly amazing trip. I would love to do something like this.

  30. Posted March 1, 2013 at 12:09 am | Permalink

    Sounds like the most magical weekend. I watched you guys on instagram and am now planning a weekend with my own friends! I can’t wait!!

  31. Nancy Guillery
    Posted March 1, 2013 at 2:46 am | Permalink

    It’s wonderful the magic, or synergy, that can happen when you’re part of a team. I am living it right now with the team challenge I’ve embarked on inthe last few months (we will be running from Montreal, Canada to New York City)

  32. Stacia
    Posted March 1, 2013 at 2:27 pm | Permalink

    Brightest blessings, Andrea! I hope to find a supportive tribe like that soon! :)

  33. Deborah
    Posted March 2, 2013 at 12:21 am | Permalink

    thank you, Andrea! I get it!

  34. Posted March 4, 2013 at 5:23 am | Permalink

    The weekend sounds completely magical, and that wishbone…wow. Thank you for sharing it all so beautifully with us.

One Trackback

  1. By Something Good | A Thousand Shades of Gray on March 4, 2013 at 11:19 pm

    […] 11. A few more posts on The Radiate Sessions, one from Kelly Rae Roberts and one from Andrea Scher. […]

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